I stepped on the scale today. Boy am I a whale. I've gained 40 pounds since high school. That's roughly 10 pounds a year. That's a lot. That = (deep breath) me weighing approx 170 pounds. I'm 5'1". I should be weighing MAX 140. Good lord. I'm a cow. A giant bad-hairdo-awkward-clothing-cow. ugh. UGH. UGHGHGH. There aren't even words to express how disgusted I am that I got this way. I was in great shape in high school. I was always working out though. Now, not so much.
Diet day 1. I am hoping that by blogging about this, by putting everything I eat and everything I do (and don't) do, I will feel a little bit more motivated to keep this going. The whole world can read this, ya know?! Right?! Ok, I have all of one follower, so maybe not the entire world....but I'll think that for motivational purposes.
What a crappy rotten day.
In the interest of full disclosure, I may have eaten two cookies and a couple bites of ice cream today. This was BEFORE I stepped on the SOB scale. hah. SOBSCALE. thats about right. You sob when you stand on it.
I have no desire to be anorexic mind you. I just want to get down to about 10 pounds over my high school weight. So 140ish. And maybe not have the cottage cheese thing going on. That'd be nice.
So anyways, Day 1.
Breakfast- Toaster Studel
Snack- Cookies (UGHGHG WHYYY COOKIES)
Lunch- Healthy choice (good!)
Depressed grab for ice cream around 3 oclock (bad)
Dinner- Tuna salad sandwich and low fat strawberry yogurt, oh and some V8 fusion for fruits and veggies (GOOD!)
So, stay tuned. I may go cry in a book for a little while.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Cooking and the ceiling's fallin down....
Ok, not really. But it's sagging in a threatening manner that makes me awfully nervous. They supposedly (and by supposedly I mean no way in hell) are supposed to come tomorrow to fix our ceiling. If they don't, I'm writing a letter to whoever (whomever?) has power over them. Seriously. This is ridiculous, and according to Clorissa B., illegal. I think it's worth a letter. Moldy ceilings tend to be bad for your health. So they say. Whoever they are. Which is a good question, when you think about it. Anyways.
I made stuffed jalapenos yesterday, following Amanda S.'s recipe from her dad. I don't do spicy, but according to Matt, he looved them. They were mostly gone. Also made my lovely mini burgers for him. And cookies. I need to put us on a diet. I'm getting gross. Matt doesn't think so, but of course he's the rose-colored glasses boyfriend of my dreams. Hah. I wish I could look good in a bikini :( I was considering getting on those Alli pills. No idea if they work or not. They are darn expensive though.
Anyways, I'll post some pictures of my creations at some point. I love cooking, I just need to cook healthy things? Arg. I'm ok with my general shape, just wish it was a little firmer. No jiggly.
I made stuffed jalapenos yesterday, following Amanda S.'s recipe from her dad. I don't do spicy, but according to Matt, he looved them. They were mostly gone. Also made my lovely mini burgers for him. And cookies. I need to put us on a diet. I'm getting gross. Matt doesn't think so, but of course he's the rose-colored glasses boyfriend of my dreams. Hah. I wish I could look good in a bikini :( I was considering getting on those Alli pills. No idea if they work or not. They are darn expensive though.
Anyways, I'll post some pictures of my creations at some point. I love cooking, I just need to cook healthy things? Arg. I'm ok with my general shape, just wish it was a little firmer. No jiggly.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Oh, apartment living
Well, Matt and I are almost moved into our new apartment. Let's make a list of the pros/cons
Pros:
-Much bigger. I have my own alley next to the bed. I don't have to roll over Matt to get to the bathroom (which he misses :p) Also, the kitchen is spacious and the living room is nice and open. Overall just a lovely layout to the apartment.
-Quieter. Well, mostly. We are in the more "upscale" (if you could call it that) area of the apartment complex, and there is much less screaming and no children hollering and running about. There are thin walls, but it's not too bad
-Overall, it's much prettier and I feel safer walking around from my car.
Cons:
-Again, thin walls...not terrible but when you can hear the guy next door clearing his throat it's just a little akward...especially knowing they can hear you!
-Leaking tub. ARG. Apparently when the maintenance man replaced the tub spout on the day we moved in, he forgot to caulk it. Result? Water pouring down from the kitchen ceiling on top of my microwave, a saggy soggy mess. argjlkfdsjg. And since they have no emergency maintenance number, we had no way to do anything about it. No one came to look at it for a good 12 hours, during which we used no water (just in case)
-Management/maintenance are idiots.
Honestly though, even with the ridiculous leaking shit it's a much better apartment and I already feel happier in it. It's starting to look really great and we're just about done decorating and moving. Well not really. Give us a week :p
In other news, parents' divorce still goin strong. And terrible. Dad came up for a night to help us move, and he seems to be in good spirits. He's taking it all in stride and just trying to stop things from getting worse. I hope everyone comes out of this ok. Mom and I aren't speaking though. Which really isn't that unusual.
Life right now is busy and a little stressful, but my life with Matt is wonderful. I love having him to come home to, and it's great to live with my best friend.
Pros:
-Much bigger. I have my own alley next to the bed. I don't have to roll over Matt to get to the bathroom (which he misses :p) Also, the kitchen is spacious and the living room is nice and open. Overall just a lovely layout to the apartment.
-Quieter. Well, mostly. We are in the more "upscale" (if you could call it that) area of the apartment complex, and there is much less screaming and no children hollering and running about. There are thin walls, but it's not too bad
-Overall, it's much prettier and I feel safer walking around from my car.
Cons:
-Again, thin walls...not terrible but when you can hear the guy next door clearing his throat it's just a little akward...especially knowing they can hear you!
-Leaking tub. ARG. Apparently when the maintenance man replaced the tub spout on the day we moved in, he forgot to caulk it. Result? Water pouring down from the kitchen ceiling on top of my microwave, a saggy soggy mess. argjlkfdsjg. And since they have no emergency maintenance number, we had no way to do anything about it. No one came to look at it for a good 12 hours, during which we used no water (just in case)
-Management/maintenance are idiots.
Honestly though, even with the ridiculous leaking shit it's a much better apartment and I already feel happier in it. It's starting to look really great and we're just about done decorating and moving. Well not really. Give us a week :p
In other news, parents' divorce still goin strong. And terrible. Dad came up for a night to help us move, and he seems to be in good spirits. He's taking it all in stride and just trying to stop things from getting worse. I hope everyone comes out of this ok. Mom and I aren't speaking though. Which really isn't that unusual.
Life right now is busy and a little stressful, but my life with Matt is wonderful. I love having him to come home to, and it's great to live with my best friend.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Divorce
I suppose that last entry was a little cryptic. My parents are getting a divorce. They have been going back and forth on this for years, and it's been pretty clear that although they love each other, they aren't happy. My dad is looking for a new place. There isn't much more to say, other than I have no idea how to handle it, and no idea how to protect my sisters.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Oh, shoot, I meant to write something in here, but it got awfully busy at work, and I get too distracted at home to write in this.
As usual, nothing is going on. I could go on about how my "friends" are not being very friendly, but it's not worth bitching about. Even though I just did. Oops. Life with Matt is fantastic. We have our squabbles, but we are able to resolve them pretty quickly and without yelling! It's great! I guess that's not really something to brag about, but I think the fact that we have a mature argument style really works for us. 99% of the time we get along great, we show each other how much we appreciate and love each other, and so on. I have very high hopes for this one. VERY high. lol.
His parents are coming in this weekend. I can't tell if they like me or not. I think they're pretty nifty, kinda like hippies, but older lol. I will hopefully make some amazing dish that will win them over. Or not. Who knows. :D
School is not really school at the moment. Once a week I go to the bowling alley and drink sodas/bowl. For a grade. hah. I do miss real classes. I miss learning, but I don't miss the work. It's lovely to have my evenings/weekends to play. I've been becoming a much better cook, and watching loads of movies, playing lots of games. It's great. I may audit a class next semester just for the heck of it.
Anyways, back to work
As usual, nothing is going on. I could go on about how my "friends" are not being very friendly, but it's not worth bitching about. Even though I just did. Oops. Life with Matt is fantastic. We have our squabbles, but we are able to resolve them pretty quickly and without yelling! It's great! I guess that's not really something to brag about, but I think the fact that we have a mature argument style really works for us. 99% of the time we get along great, we show each other how much we appreciate and love each other, and so on. I have very high hopes for this one. VERY high. lol.
His parents are coming in this weekend. I can't tell if they like me or not. I think they're pretty nifty, kinda like hippies, but older lol. I will hopefully make some amazing dish that will win them over. Or not. Who knows. :D
School is not really school at the moment. Once a week I go to the bowling alley and drink sodas/bowl. For a grade. hah. I do miss real classes. I miss learning, but I don't miss the work. It's lovely to have my evenings/weekends to play. I've been becoming a much better cook, and watching loads of movies, playing lots of games. It's great. I may audit a class next semester just for the heck of it.
Anyways, back to work
